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I like this a lot, the simplicity of the piece is really nicely done. I think you did especially well with the fast movements. Good work :)

Pretty fun stuff. Definitely won me over with the Wilhelm Screams. Nice work.

BMimo responds:

thx

I like the idea here, it's really cute. The problem is the execution doesn't quite live up to the idea. The audio sounds distant and faded, almost as if it was played from an audio source and then recorded with a low-quality microphone. The characters look good but their animations are a little strange. For example when the unicorn gets eaten it just goes behind the head rather than into the mouth. That said, however, the animation does look really smooth! As a personal note I'd like to see a bit of background work done here, but that may be an intentional stylistic choice.

Overall though, I do like this :) keep it up.

Looks pretty dope. All I'd say is some of the line work could be cleaned up a little, and the character rotations could use a little more attention too, the spin at around 7 seconds is a bit choppy, a couple extra keyframes there with the features moved a little bit should smooth that out. Even if you didn't do either of those though I'd say this is pretty good. Definitely good enough to use as an intro. Nice work!

bucketboi responds:

yeah, i see what you're saying.
thanks for the feedback, gonna work on my lining and in-betweens when I go back to this.

Incredible. I'm speechless. Great work on both audio and visuals, but the audio particularly stands out to me. One of the most unique animations I've seen in quite a while. Very well done!

Try to cut out those repeat frames between the end of the one cycle and the beginning of the next. There should only be one frame of the "neutral" state, other wise it looks like the character is stopping every time they take two steps, then taking two more steps, then stopping, and so forth.

Otherwise, it looks pretty cool, I like the style, and unlike everyone else's comments I think the big feet is unique and makes the character feel more personalized :)

Last recommendation I have would be to put some more effort into the backgrounds to make them more interesting! But I get that this is mostly a test, so it's forgivable.

Nantendo responds:

Right, i actually added the last couple frames of the cycle in because it looked worse before like a big gap but i see what you mean. But thnx a lot bro lol appreciate the comments

This is pretty great :) I gotta say, those are some damn good backgrounds, great work there! Also you definitely put those colour gradients to good use! The story is cute too. The biggest problem I have with this animation is the dialogue is a bit wonky. I just can't really imagine a real person talking like that. It's written strangely and the delivery is just... forced I suppose. So I'd say just work on that vocal delivery and this has potential to be superb. Good work :)

7eo responds:

Thanks a lot!

Haha, you're absolutely right. That's how I felt recording myself ;)
Good critique!

This is actually really cool and fairly well done for a first animation! I think the sound effects are put to really good use and the use of colour over the otherwise entirely black and white animation is a very powerful tool with a strong effect on the viewer. So, there's some seriously strong points here!

That said, there is also plenty of room for improvement! First off, this animation is just honestly way too short to throw a "to be continued" in there. There simply isn't enough content here to draw viewers to a strong enough conviction that they will follow you in order to seek out the next installation.
Backgrounds are a really big thing for me and you didn't put very much work in to them here. For the most part, your backgrounds are pretty much just empty save for the clock. I'd say putting a little bit more work in that department will go a long way.
You could also smooth out the animation a bit with the part with the arm by just creating more keyframes, it's a little jumpy.

Anyway, this piece is pretty artistic and I think shows a lot of potential. Good luck, I hope to see more from you in the future :)

That was pretty well done! I like the style, it's unique and conveyed the story well. And the story itself was interesting, kept me paying attention the whole time. Good work!

There are some questionable stylistic choices here, in my opinion, the unchanging background or the blue character being uncoloured at the end, things of that nature. That said, I do really like the art here. This is definitely proof that Flash animation can be used to create "fine art" in a sense. Nice piece overall. Good work! Hope to see more. :)

Co-host of A Couple of Crickets Podcast, and Even More Sound Podcast; creator of FlowDownStream; animator; """musician"""; university dropout

Gage Goodell @GoodL

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Concordia University, Montreal

Idaho

Joined on 8/18/15

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